Holy shit, you guys! I just read my last blog... what a downer! Maybe I should refrain from writing when I'm pissed off. I mean, it is an interesting insight into my psyche, but it does not make for very enjoyable reading! And speaking of deadlines (as I did in my last post), I just missed another one. This one was for a job opportunity. AND I have just been notified that I have been placed on academic probation. WTF? I think it's time to quit my job, get out of the rat-race of modern society, and just become famous already. I mean it! I really should just stop pursuing nursing as a career altogether and put my talents to work. I just wrote two kick ass songs in the last 24 hours, so yeah, pretty sure I am the next big thing. Watch out, Katy Perry! You're not the only good girl gone mainstream! Booya!
Meanwhile... on planet Earth!... I have had shitloads of company over the last few days, and I have to say, I kinda like it! I mean seriously, what better way to keep your house clean than having 24 hour surveillance of it by outsiders?! Plus, I actually enjoy being hospitable to others. I know, weird, right? I never would have guessed that about myself. Also, over the last few days I have taken a vast interest in my own friends! Holy shit people, I think I am becoming a good person or something! And everything around me just seems to look... less shitty. Haha, I just had a thought... I wonder.... If I keep blogging over a period of time, if you guys could figure out what time of the month it is just by reading my material! haha! I think all women are bi-polar. I think we were just made that way. Am I making anyone uncomfortable yet?
A friend of mine recently told me that his girlfriend is psycho. He said she tried to explain to him the reason why she is the way she is. I say, if you have enough insight to figure out what it is that has messed you up, then it is time to stop using it as an excuse to continue to act like a crazy person. Just wanted to add a little pop psychology in there, for ya.
I also say, if you're a big person, you should wear big-people clothes; and if you're a little person, you should wear little-people clothes. That one just seems like a no-brainer to me, yet whenever I go out in public, I see people who get the equation wrong for some reason. You know what I mean, "There's not enough pants where there should be. More pants." Yes, audience, that is a Superbad reference! "Yeah, cuz the chicks go crazy for that male camel toe." "It's like a division sign." Haha, hilarious!
I am going to make this one short because I really don't have any more good material. Yes, people, you only get the best of me here, so don't start getting all obsessed over me, I'm really not this witty, intelligent, and hilarious all the time... WAIT, yes I AM! haha... But seriously, I care so much that I would rather just cut you off than to continue to lengthen this blog with fluff. "Fluff," is the directionless ramble of an entertainer with no material, and I swear, guys, I would never do that to you! I hate it when entertainers do that, because you feel like they are only giving you half their effort. And people who take time out of their days to support their favorite entertainers don't deserve to get fluffed on! Haha! I just fluffed on you! : ) Whatchya gon' do about it, chump? Nothin'. That's right. Wow. I am such a bullshitter. HILARIOUS! Spell check points out words like haha and no-brainer but does not highlight bullshitter! That just made my day! I think I will end on this classy high-note!
Take care, and stay tuned, kids!
A periodic dose of reassurance that you are not the only weirdo out there...
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